Can't Stop Myself From Loving You
by ijustkeepswimming
Summary: Set after Charlie and Joey's first kiss, Charlie and Joey try to figure out their feelings for each other...
1. Chapter 1

_Hi everyone. Welcome to my new fic. I hope you like it. Very nervous! This story will be in ten parts and it's set during the post-kiss scene where Charlie decides to go and visit her Dad and Joey tells her that she loves her. It's a different way that it could have gone. I actually had two different ideas for this one so I hope you like the direction I have taken it. Love, IJKS xxx_

**Chapter One**

"I'll miss you," Joey said.

Charlie Buckton gazed at the woman she had no choice but to describe as her best friend. Joey Collins had just told her that she loved her. And Charlie had just about managed to admit that she was attracted to Joey but that she was confused and afraid of her feelings. She'd told her that she was going to go and stay with her Dad for a few days in order to try and clear her head. She hoped that one way or another, she would be able to figure out whether she would be brave enough to come home and be with Joey properly or if she would, as she suspected, walk away from the whole thing. She hated herself for being so afraid, especially after the way she had insisted to Joey when she was afraid of coming out, that there was nothing to be ashamed of. It wasn't so easy when it was her own feelings she was facing.

She froze as she watched Joey, as if in slow motion, shift and lean forward. Before she could stop her, she felt Joey's lips gently press against her cheek. Her heart began to pound and she tingled all over at Joey's touch. Everything inside her was screaming that she should push her away, tell her not to get too close. Instead, she turned her head. Love surged within her, as she brushed her own lips against Joey's. The younger girl pulled back, a little startled. It was the last thing she had expected. They gazed into each other's eyes for a moment, before meeting again in another kiss. Charlie's breath caught as she crushed her lips against Joey's, settling one hand on her hip and using the other to try and keep herself up.

Joey's hands found their way into Charlie's hair, wanting to hold onto this moment for as long as she could get away with. She was certain that Charlie would recover her senses fairly quickly and whether it was right or wrong, she wanted to keep her for as long as she could. She felt her soul soar as the kiss lingered between them, getting ever more passionate until she felt Charlie gently touch her lips with her tongue. Sure that she would faint from sheer joy at any moment, Joey parted her lips, more than happy to deepen the kiss as much as Charlie wanted to. She settled her arms around Charlie's shoulders, pulling her closer.

Their chests pressed against each other as both women refused to come up for air. Charlie leaned closer and before they could stop themselves, Joey had tumbled back on the mattress, pulling Charlie with her. Their mouths parted for just a moment as Charlie leaned over her, gazing into her eyes. This was exactly why she needed to get away from Joey. She couldn't think clearly around her. She was controlled by desire. But it was deeper than that. Joey was completely right. Charlie had fallen in love with her. Lowering her head, covering Joey's body with her own, Charlie kissed her again and again and again.

Several minutes later, with Charlie resting on top of Joey, they'd kissed until they were breathless. Charlie held herself up on her elbows and Joey's hands had found their way to Charlie's back, holding her close as all her dreams came true. With her head swimming, Charlie finally pulled away. She gazed into Joey's eyes and watched lust become fear. Their hearts beat against their chests, building some kind of rhythm between them. Joey had so many questions to ask but she was afraid of breaking the spell. Charlie had kissed her last night and then she'd avoided her for most of the day. Joey had put her heart on the line and told her she loved her. But Charlie was clearly afraid of her feelings and couldn't return the sentiment.

"I'm sorry," Charlie managed.

Joey nodded, expecting Charlie to panic within the second and run away. She was surprised when she remained exactly where she was, moving only to run her fingers through Joey's long, dark hair, brushing it out of her eyes.

"I'm confusing you," the police officer said.

Joey nodded and managed a self conscious smile.

"I'm sorry," Charlie said again. "I guess... I guess this is what I meant."

Joey gazed at Charlie's lips, wondering if she would ever get to kiss them again. She desperately wanted to.

"I'm afraid of how I feel," Charlie admitted.

She knew she ought to move. They were in an extremely compromising position. But she wanted to stay in Joey's arms forever.

"I've never looked at another woman in that way," she ventured. "And when I'm not with you, it's so easy to pretend... except for the fact that I can't stop thinking about you."

She managed a smile but tears had started. Joey reached out and tenderly stroked the drops away. She didn't want to be responsible for causing her any pain.

"And then when I'm with you," Charlie said. "Well, things like this happen."

"I kinda like things like this," Joey admitted quietly but cheekily.

Charlie laughed.

"So do I," she said.

Slowly, she leant down and kissed Joey again. She closed her eyes, feeling like their souls were merging right there on the bed. They kissed again and again. Each moment of intimacy felt more loving and more wonderful. They looked up and froze when the door opened.


	2. Chapter 2

_Thank you to everyone who has left such kind and lovely reviews. I'm really glad you're enjoying the story so far. On to chapter two... and yep, you were right about who was at the door... Love, IJKS xxx_

**Chapter Two**

"Ruby!" Charlie squeaked in panic.

The teenager stood, frozen in the doorway looking horrified. Charlie leapt up, scrambling away from Joey who sat up quickly, heart pounding. Of all the things that could happened, this was possibly the worst scenario they could have encountered.

"What is this?" Ruby demanded.

"Um... well, we were just..." Charlie faltered.

She stood by the bed, not daring to look at Joey and completely unable to look away from Ruby.

"I saw what you were doing!" Ruby exclaimed. "Why were you doing it?"

"Um... it was just... uh..."

She finally glanced at Joey who looked as unsure as she did.

"Should I leave you to it?" the younger girl asked anxiously.

Charlie chewed her lip. She had no idea how to handle this. If only she had been able to control herself, then they wouldn't be in this mess.

"I think that's a good idea," Ruby said coldly.

She liked Joey but she'd been concerned for a while now that she was designs on her sister. And today had only proved it. Charlie watched unhappily as Joey escaped off the bed, head bowed, nudging past Ruby and leaving the room. Ruby watched her go and then entered the room more fully, closing the door behind her. She faced Charlie across the bed with her hands on her hips.

"What the hell is going on?" she demanded.

Charlie burst into tears. Compassionately, Ruby rushed forward and hugged her.

"Charlie, did Joey force to you...?"

"No!" Charlie said.

She couldn't bear to make Joey the bad guy. If anyone was innocent in all of this, it was her. They sat down on the edge of the bed together.

"Then what happened?" Ruby asked.

"It just... happened," Charlie explained.

She felt like her head was about to explode.

"Are you attracted to her or something?"

Charlie nodded. Ruby's eyes widened in shock.

"Are you serious?" she asked.

Charlie rubbed her eyes and she had the beginnings of a headache.

"I don't know how to explain it."

"Charlie, you're not gay," Ruby said firmly. "I know you feel responsible for Joey and I know you're best friends and that you care about her but don't confuse it with anything else, okay?"

"I just... whenever I'm with her..."

"You get carried away with your strong feelings of friendship towards her," Ruby said.

Charlie was both unnerved and comforted by the certainty in her voice. She wanted her to be right. She wanted to have just got carried away with loving Joey as a friend. Perhaps it didn't have to be more than that.

"Do you think so?" she asked.

"I know you, Charlie," Ruby told her. "You've always liked guys. You've _only _liked guys. Maybe you think Joey's attractive or something, which, you know, she is. But maybe that, coupled with you being so emotionally close and... and also, because you've hardly had the best time with men lately..."

Charlie nodded. Ruby squeezed her hand.

"I think you're just confused," she said.

"I'm definitely that," Charlie admitted. "It's like... when we're not together, I'm totally normal. And then when I see her, I get all silly and swoony and..."

She shook her head.

"Has this happened before?" Ruby asked anxiously.

"We kissed last night too," Charlie said. "I'd just saved her life and then she said she was leaving town and I just had to make her stay."

"Well, there you go then!" Ruby said triumphantly.

Charlie's confusion grew.

"You love Joey in a friend way," her sister explained. "And you were afraid of losing her and it's been pretty obvious that she likes you so you were just doing whatever you felt necessary to make her stay. That makes perfect sense. I mean, I don't think I could go as far as kissing a girl, personally, but..."

Charlie managed a smile. She hoped that Ruby was right but she was terrified that she wasn't.

"What am I meant to do now?" she asked. "I don't want to hurt Joey. She means the world to me."

"You just need to sit down with her and explain," Ruby said. "You know... say that you really care about her and you got a little carried away but nothing can happen between you. You just need to draw a line under this... indiscretion and start again."

Charlie nodded, sighing heavily. This was going to be impossible.

"Hey," Ruby said kindly. "You can't help it if you're straight any more than she can help being gay. Of course a relationship between the two of you was never going to work."


	3. Chapter 3

_For Shyrie. There are seven chapters left to go. Love, IJKS xxx_

**Chapter Three**

Joey sat anxiously in the room she had been living in for weeks. All of Charlie's things surrounded her and she wondered what was going to happen next. Would Ruby freak out or be understanding? What would Charlie tell her? Joey had no earthly idea. She looked up fearfully when the door opened. Charlie hovered uncertainly in front of her.

"Hey," the police officer said.

"Hey," Joey replied. "Are you... are you okay?"

Charlie nodded although neither of them were particularly convinced it was true.

"What did Ruby say?"

Charlie paused for a moment before coming to sit beside her, keeping a fairly safe distance.

"I told her how confused I was," she said. "And she made me think about things a little more clearly."

Joey swallowed, worried about the answer. Somehow she couldn't exactly see Ruby encouraging Charlie to be with her.

"I'm really sorry, Joey," Charlie said. "But I can't be with you."

Tears rolled down her cheeks and she tried to ignore them. Her heart ached at the thought of hurting Joey or letting her down. There was a voice in the back of her mind telling her that if this hurt so much then surely she should be taking the risk and admitting how she felt? But she couldn't. She thought about Ruby and how certain she was that her feelings were just misguided. And she could hardly bear the way she'd looked at her.

"But... but you said..." Joey tried unhappily.

She felt tears sting her own eyes but she tried to hold them in. Crying wasn't going to help anything. She dared to glance at Charlie who seemed not to have the same reservations. Her heart was breaking and it was written all over her face. It gave Joey hope that maybe Charlie did love her after all, even if she wasn't ready to admit it.

"I know," Charlie said sadly. "I really like you, Joey. And I think you're the most beautiful woman I've ever met. You're my best friend and I really hope I can keep you as such. But I'm not gay. I can't pretend otherwise."

Tears escaped Joey's eyes. She hurried to brush them away.

"I thought you enjoyed kissing me..." she said quietly.

Charlie closed her eyes and took a breath.

"I did but..."

"If you care for me that much and you find me attractive and you like kissing me, doesn't that mean...?"

"It doesn't mean I could ever do more than that," Charlie lied.

She'd thought about being intimate with Joey on several occasions and the idea had sent thrills through her. She wondered what Joey looked like beneath her clothes and what it would be like to touch her. How would it feel to be touched by her? How did girls even make love with each other anyway?

"Okay," Joey said sadly.

"I'm sorry," Charlie said, both to Joey and to herself.

Joey looked at her and just about managed a smile.

"It's fine," she said. "I'll um... I'll be out of you hair within the hour."

She stood up and opened the wardrobe to pull out her bags.

"What?" Charlie squeaked in alarm. "Where are you going?"

"I don't know yet," Joey said. "But I can't stay here."

Charlie stood up, holding onto Joey's hands and forcing her to stop packing.

"Why not? Joey, I want to be friends still. I..."

"Charlie, this isn't all about you," Joey said as kindly as she could manage. "I know you want to be friends and maybe in time we can be but right now, it's too hard. I can barely breathe around you. I look at you and fall more deeply for you. And if you've just been confused or pretending or whatever all this time... I can't be around you. Not now."

"I didn't mean to..."

Joey reached out and stroked Charlie's face, gazing into her eyes.

"I know," she said. "I know you didn't mean to hurt me. But you did. And I have to go away to lick my wounds, okay? Especially now that Ruby knows. I'm feeling like a prize idiot right now to ever have entertained the thought that someone like you could ever be interested in me."

"I..."

"But I really did," Joey admitted. "I thought there was something between us. But there wasn't. Not from your side. I can't be around you."

Charlie felt her heart break. Silently, she watched Joey begin to pack her stuff. She willed herself to step up and be honest but she still couldn't put her feelings into words. Cursing herself for hurting Joey so badly, she gave up and left the room.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

It was the evening and Charlie was feeling lost. Joey had moved out to the caravan park and Charlie's heart was breaking over losing her. She wondered what else she had expected though. How could she have thought that rejecting Joey would be a good thing? It cleared her head and it made it easier to convince herself that she'd just misplaced her feelings but it didn't help the hole in her heart. And it didn't make her feel good that Joey, who had already been through so much, was now out in the cold. And she thought Charlie had been disingenuous each time she'd kissed her. Ruby thought so too. They'd decided that Charlie had just been confused and got carried away. Charlie wanted to believe it but she wasn't sure it was true. She had feelings for Joey – strong ones. But she had no idea what to do about them. So now, she was camped out in the lounge with Ruby, attempting to watch a DVD. But it was hard to concentrate.

"Charlie, I know you're upset but you have to forget about this," Ruby told her.

Charlie nodded, casting a glance at her sister. She smiled and they turned back to the television screen.

* * *

Joey sat anxiously in the little caravan that she would be renting for a few days. Without a wage, she wasn't going to be able to stay there for long. She couldn't go back to Charlie's and she couldn't go to Brett's either. She had no idea what her next move ought to be but she was entertaining the thought of going on a long haul, if there was a job opening any time soon. That way, she could sail out of Summer Bay and hopefully leave all her cares behind. She would happily live on a trawler and work to save up some cash while she tried to figure out what to do next. It would make it easier to forget about Robbo, she hoped. And Charlie. Sighing and feeling trapped in the small van, Joey grabbed her keys and headed out into the night.

* * *

"Ruby?" Charlie began nervously.

Her sister turned to look at her, offering her full attention.

"If I'd have said that things were real between Joey and I, what would you have said?"

Ruby looked startled for a moment.

"But they're not," she said.

"I know," Charlie lied, bowing her head and twisting her fingers together. "But if they were?"

Ruby shrugged and turned back to the TV.

"You're not gay, Charlie," she said. "You of all people cannot be gay!"

Charlie frowned at the insinuation but she let it go.

"So, I have no capacity to imagine what it would be like for me if you suddenly told me you were a lesbian," she said.

"I wouldn't have to be a lesbian to be into Joey," Charlie ventured, wondering how far she could push a hypothetical situation.

Ruby paused the DVD and turned to face her.

"What are you trying to tell me?" she asked.

"Nothing!" Charlie said quickly. "Just that..."

She sighed heavily and closed her eyes, telling Ruby that it didn't matter. Ruby watched her for a few moments longer, feeling conflicted. When Charlie didn't say anything more, Ruby turned back to the television and continued watching the antics on screen.

* * *

Joey wound up at the Surf Club and ordered a lonely glass of wine. Sitting at a table, she turned over the events of the last couple of days. She'd nearly been killed by Robbo. And then she'd been kissed by Charlie. Then Charlie had avoided her. And then Charlie had kissed her again. But then of course, she'd rejected her for the final time. It felt like life just got worse and worse.

"Hey," said a voice.

Joey looked up to see Hugo standing over her.

"Are you okay?"

She just about managed to smile and said she'd had a long couple of days. He sat down uninvited.

"Yeah, I heard you got attacked yesterday," he said. "Sorry to hear that. It must have really shaken you up."

Joey nodded.

"So, um... where's your bodyguard?" he said with a grin.

They both thought back to the way Charlie had basically chased him out of the Surf Club the other day. Joey couldn't even begin to try and figure out what had really motivated that. She'd said it was because she'd seen Robbo and it had shaken her up but Joey was as confused about that as she was about everything else now.

"Yeah, sorry about that," Joey said, smiling softly back at him. "Charlie's pretty protective."

He nodded.

"It must be nice to have someone looking out for you," he said. "She cares about you a lot."

Joey raised her eyebrows.

"Put it this way, I think I know more about you than about her after our date."

Joey looked even more confused. Hugo explained that Joey had obviously been on her mind during their date because it had only been towards the end of the main course that she'd finally agreed to stop talking about her. Joey laughed, unsure of how she felt about such a revelation.

"Listen, I know this is going to make me look like one hell of a dodgy character but... would you like to go for dinner sometime?"

Joey looked and felt startled.

"What about Charlie?" she asked.

"I get the feeling she's not that into me," he said. "Not that you'd be second choice or anything!"

"I'm flattered," Joey said, although she wasn't sure she really was. "But I don't think so."

"Because of Charlie?"

"Because I'm gay," Joey replied.

Hugo's mouth hung open.

"I had no idea," he said apologetically, as if she had told him she were dying or something. "I mean, you don't look like... you're so hot."

Joey snorted. This time, she was rather flattered.

"I'm not sure a person's attractiveness is relevant to someone's sexual orientation," Joey pointed out.

He apologised.

* * *

It was officially night time. Ruby had gone to bed and so had Leah and VJ. Charlie was back in her own room and had every intention of getting undressed but hadn't quite managed to get that far. She'd curled up on the mattress and hugged the pillow that Joey had been resting her head on night after night. She could still smell the scent of her shampoo on the material. Hugging it close and trying not to cry, Charlie had found a little teddy bear beneath it. She recognised him as Joey's and she knew she struggled to sleep without him. Sitting up, Charlie wondered what she ought to do. Before she thought it through, she'd taken the bear and quietly slipped out of the house.

* * *

Joey was back in her caravan, still feeling terribly lost and lonely. Sighing heavily, she pondered bed. She didn't like to admit it but she was scared of sleeping by herself in a little, tin box. What if Robbo somehow managed to escape prison? What if he came after her? She'd felt so protected at Charlie's house, tucked up in her bed and knowing she was only upstairs, always eager to protect her. She froze when there was a knock on her door.

"Joey?" came a female voice that she instantly recognised as being Charlie.

Swallowing uncertainly and tempted to ignore her, Joey eventually headed over to the door and opened up. Charlie stood there looking shy and holding out Joey's tiny teddy bear.

"You... you left Santa Bear behind," she said.


	5. Chapter 5

_This is for JB. And for jsco81 who thought Santa Bear was cute. He's real! He's mine! Love, IJKS xxx_

**Chapter Five**

Joey thanked Charlie for Santa Bear. They looked at each other for a long time in silence.

"Can I come in?" Charlie finally asked.

"It's late..." Joey objected but her heart was desperate to say yes.

"I know," Charlie said. "Sorry."

She didn't turn away though. Joey sighed and stepped back. Charlie followed her into the caravan and shut the door.

"I'm not sure what spending more time together is going to achieve," Joey said, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Charlie hesitantly sat beside her.

"I'm really sorry for everything," Charlie said.

Her heart pounded in her ears and just being close to Joey again. She was suddenly very glad that her friend had left her teddy bear behind. Apparently her favourite auntie had bought it for her one Christmas when she was five and she hadn't been parted from it since.

"For kissing me when you didn't actually want to or for not wanting to?" Joey asked sadly.

"I did want to," Charlie told her.

Joey looked into her eyes, trying desperately hard to figure her out but it all felt impossible. She had never known anyone to be capable of sending so many mixed messages.

"Right," she said. "You just couldn't bear to do anything else."

Charlie closed her eyes, trying not to picture how it would be to take things further with Joey. She was startled to realise just how much she wanted to. It unnerved her as realisation dawned. She hadn't been reacting to Joey's feelings at all. It was nothing to do with her past experiences with men. It was Joey. She loved her. She wanted her. She needed her.

"I love you."

Both women froze. The words had tumbled from Charlie's lips before she could rein them in. Now they both looked startled and a little afraid.

"What are you talking about, Charlie?" Joey finally asked.

Charlie stuttered over what to say next. She hadn't meant to be that honest. And she was painfully aware that all this chopping and changing her mind wasn't doing poor Joey any good. It was as if it was her sole mission in life to confuse the hell out of her.

"I love you," she repeated.

Joey stood up and moved away from her, opening the door.

"You can go now," she said.

Charlie looked tearful.

"But..."

"Charlie, you can't keep messing me around like this!" Joey said desperately. "I can't keep doing this with you... having you pull me close and then push me away. It's not fair."  
"I know!" Charlie said, getting her to feet. "I know and I'm so sorry."

"You know what? You're always sorry."

Charlie reached out and held both of Joey's hands in hers.

"I know I've probably left it too late but I want to be with you," she said, scared of the risk she was taking.

Joey pulled away.

"Yeah, until Ruby finds out or someone else does," she said. "Then you'll just panic and reject me all over again. And make me feel like crap in the process."

Charlie licked her lips, devastated to have burnt his bridges before she'd figured out how she felt.

"Sorry," she said again. "I guess I'm too late."

She moved past Joey and headed towards the door, pausing only when Joey called her name. Turning round, she gazed into her beautiful eyes.

"Would you really want to make something work?" the younger girl asked.

Charlie nodded.

"What about all your confusion and your fear?"

"I can deal," Charlie said. "I mean, I don't think I'm about to go and march in a gay parade but... I can try and get my head around things."

"Will you be willing to tell anyone?" Joey asked.

Charlie nodded, although the idea terrified her. Joey didn't reply but she was clearly thinking about what Charlie had said. Charlie was terrified of letting her down again but she couldn't bear to lose her without trying. Slowly, she stepped forward. Her hands reached up to caress Joey's face. She leant in and kissed her.


	6. Chapter 6

_Okay, this is going to be a bit of an essay but I promise there's a chapter at the bottom of it!_

_So... I don't normally respond to people who feel the need to be unpleasant just for the sake of it but I thought I would in this case. I'm not sure who on earth has the time to read stories they're not enjoying and then take the time to review nastily. Repeatedly. Oh, and then to go back and check to see if they have pissed any other reviewers off and attack them, which is absolutely uncalled for. Personally, if I've got time to do that then I'd have to find something else to occupy myself with!_

_But to be honest, whatever the reasons, I'm a bit tired of it now. I'm all for constructive criticism but just being rude for the sake of it is unnecessary. And I tend to find that people who will do this, won't sign in so at least for the time being, I have blocked anonymous reviews. I just don't need the hassle to be honest. Life is stressful enough without losing the enjoyment factor of a hobby. Hopefully now, anyone trying to be deliberately antagonistic can go and find something more productive to do. Or they can sign in and be offensive and get reported if it means that much to them to tell me how rubbish I am._

_I don't know what the problem is exactly. The whole point of CJ fanfic, in my humble opinion, is to give us the happy ending we were denied in the show itself. And I'll stand by that. Exploring the realms of fanfiction is meant to be fun and light hearted. Even with the heavier plot lines, it's about the journey to get to a good place again. For me, it's about stepping out of the real world for a little while and enjoying a story. As for being accused of not living in reality and believing in a happy ending, to be honest, that couldn't be further from the truth! But that's the fun of writing, reading, escaping all the shit and enjoying a happy community like the one we have built here._

_So anyway, thank you to the people who have stuck up for me. I don't know what this particular person has against me but I hope something nice happens to her so she won't feel the need to be unkind to random strangers. I'm fairly certain I haven't put a gun to anyone's head and forced them to read my stories. It's not an obligation! But they're there for anyone who does enjoy them. So, to those who have been sweet enough to encourage me specifically on this issue, namely tubs14 and jensy25 – thank you. There are so many lovely readers who mean the world to me so thank you all as well. As long as you're happy for me to keep writing, I will. I've got these five stories to finish and another five stories on the go. So, thanks again. Sorry to have to block anonymous users but I hope that the people who have accounts will carry on reading and reviewing!_

_Love, IJKS xxx_

**

* * *

**

Chapter Six

Charlie and Joey had been kissing on the bed for a long time. The world floated away from both of them as they solely focussed on each other. Leaning over Joey on the cramped single bed, Charlie brushed the hair out of her new girlfriend's eyes. She smiled lovingly at her, touched by the expression on her beautiful face.

"Is this really real, Charlie?" Joey asked quietly.

Charlie was saddened by the sudden look of doubt on her face.

"You're not going to wake up tomorrow and change your mind? Or, you know, when we start telling people?"

Charlie kissed her gently.

"I can't promise not to freak out," she admitted. "But I can promise to always do my best and to always make sure I put you first. I... I love you, Joey."

Joey smiled. It was the third time she'd said it but it seemed to mean even more each time.

"I love you too," she said honestly.

They kissed again and again. Charlie pressed her body against Joey's. Before she could regain any sense of composure, her hand slipped down and cupped Joey's breast. She pulled back quickly, as if she'd been burnt. Her cheeks turned pink. Joey smiled.

"It's okay, Charlie," she said softly. "You can touch."

Charlie licked her lips and slowly lowered her hand, still blushing.

"I just never saw the day when I wanted to... you know... touch another woman."

She looked down at Joey's chest and gently stroked her thumb across it. She smiled, enjoying the feel of Joey's body beneath her.

"Is it okay?" Joey asked.

Charlie gazed back at her face in confusion.

"You're not touching me and deciding that you don't want to after all, are you?"

Charlie kissed her again and smiled.

"Of all the things I was thinking, that definitely wasn't it," she promised.

Joey grinned. She ran her hands through Charlie's hair and ran her fingertips down her back. Charlie's thumb did not pause in its motion.

"What were you thinking?" Joey asked, a hint of teasing in her tone.

"I was thinking that for all my fears, touching you feels like the most natural thing in the world."

They kissed again.

"And I was thinking that this van is pretty cramped," Charlie said. "Maybe we could... if you wanted to... we could... go home."

"Together?"

"Well, I'm not planning on leaving you!" Charlie said.

Then she blushed.

"Not that I'm expecting anything!" she added quickly. "Just... you know... whatever we feel comfortable with. We could... just, you know, kiss and... and touch and... whatever felt right. And sleep. Together. We could hold each other."

Her blushes continued. She was about to start rambling all over again when Joey cut in.

"I'd love to," she said.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, Charlie and Joey let themselves into the house, grateful that everyone was already in bed. Charlie locked the door. Carrying one of Joey's bags in one hand and leading Joey with the other, Charlie headed into her bedroom. Inside, with the door closed, Charlie and Joey both let go of the bags they were carrying. They perched on the edge of the bed together, looking a little shy. Without any more words, they fell into each other's arms, quickly tumbling back on the mattress. This time, Joey leant over Charlie, who happily let her take the lead, although both of them felt nervous.

They kissed tenderly for a long time, both a little shy to take things further. Finally, Charlie braced herself to cup Joey's breast again, like she had in the caravan. Joey smiled and kissed her a little harder. She let her own hard slip beneath the fabric of Charlie's red top. She stroked her tummy, making circular patterns up to her breast. Charlie tingled at the touch. She didn't think she'd ever felt so excited before. She felt like she was losing her virginity all over again, only this time, she was doing it right. Taking the initiative, she eased her fingers beneath Joey's t-shirt, following the same kind of patterns that Joey was making. Shifting slowly, Joey carefully moved to straddle Charlie's hips. Charlie smiled and withdrew her hand. She let her fingers hover at the hem of Joey's t-shirt, eager to remove it. Reading her expression, Joey smiled encouragingly and helped her lift it off. The material landed in a heap somewhere on the floor and Charlie sat up to kiss Joey's lips again. She gazed at Joey's almost exposed chest and smiled. Her heart raced at how inviting she was. A little awkwardly, she reached up and stroked the curve of Joey's breasts before reaching slowly around to try and unhook her bra. After three failed attempts, they both giggled.

"It's hard from that angle!" Charlie said.

Joey stroked Charlie's hair, smiling affectionately at her and offering assistance. Charlie nodded eagerly and watched as Joey reached behind her and undid the clasp. She didn't want to miss a moment of it. Swallowing a little anxiously, Joey removed her bra and dropped it behind her on the floor. Feeling shy, she looked at Charlie, whose eyes were firmly fixed on her chest.

"I'm embarrassed," Joey admitted.

"I'm excited!" Charlie replied without hesitation.

Blushing, she glanced up at Joey. This all felt so new but it also felt so right. Smiling, Joey bent down and kissed her. When they parted, Charlie swallowed. Her hands hovered over Joey's chest, seeking permission to touch. Joey took Charlie's hands and placed them against her. Charlie smiled, slowly beginning to explore with her fingertips. Gaining confidence, she lowered her lips to Joey's breasts, offering gentle, chaste kisses. Joey felt her skin tingle. She ran her hands through Charlie's hair. She tugged at the hem of Charlie's top, swiftly pulling it off and then making short work of her bra. She paused. Half naked Charlie was something she thought she'd only ever dream of seeing. But now she was right there before her, she thought she was even more beautiful than she'd imagined. She smiled. Charlie sucked in her breath, hoping that she was acceptable to Joey.

"You're so beautiful," Joey said.

Her voice was barely audible but filled with passion. She guided Charlie back onto the bed, still straddling her. Gently, she kissed her way down Charlie's body. Closing her eyes for a brief moment, she slipped one hand down to tease Charlie's right nipple with her fingers. She smiled as she heard the police officer's breath catch. Encouraged, she lowered her mouth and began to tease her with her tongue. Charlie closed her eyes, her head swimming with pleasure. Since they had first met, Charlie had been the one to lead the way. She'd guided and protected Joey and now it felt strangely wonderful to let her take the lead. Keeping her fingers going, Joey moved her lips to Charlie's other breast, savouring the taste and feel of her against her tongue.

* * *

Half an hour later, Charlie and Joey were lying side by side on the bed, their bodies pressed close as they continued to explore. Charlie was wearing nothing but a black thong and Joey was still in her shorts, although they had been unfastened. Charlie ran her fingers along Joey's side, making her giggle.

"I can't believe we're here right now," Joey admitted, taking the moment to gaze into Charlie's blue eyes.

Charlie smiled and kissed her.

"Nor can I," she said. "I'm sorry for messing you around before."

"It's okay."

"But..."

Joey kissed her into silence.

"It's okay," she repeated. "Everything is okay."

Charlie smiled as Joey shifted her onto her back. The younger woman covered Charlie's body with her own, kissing her way down from her lips until she had reached the top of Charlie's underwear. She kissed her over the top of the material. Charlie felt lust and heat surge within her and willingly complied as Joey eased the skimpy material down. Guiding Charlie's underwear down her long legs, Joey flung it onto the top of the pile of clothes on the floor. She kissed her way back up Charlie's legs before finally stopping to look at the full vision of beauty that was Charlie's body. Charlie chewed her lip a little self consciously. Joey smiled at her, wanting to make sure that she hadn't overstepped any boundaries. Charlie shifted slightly to get more comfortable, unconsciously parting her legs a little more in anticipation.

Encouraged, Joey leant down and kissed her centre softly. She closed her eyes to the delightful warmth radiating from Charlie. Stroking delicately with her index finger, Joey began to explore, first with her fingers and then her tongue. Resting her head on the pillows, Charlie closed her eyes and gave into every sensation Joey was offering. She had never been touched in such a way before. It felt amazing. If Charlie had ever wanted to deny the reactions Joey provoked in her, she knew she could never do it now. It was only their first time and yet already Joey knew exactly what she was doing and exactly how to make her happy. A moan escaped Charlie's lips as she parted her legs a little more, not wanting to offer any kind of restriction to Joey's exploration. Encouraged, Joey continued to pleasure Charlie, enjoying her delicious taste and texture. Pushing a finger inside her, she penetrated her while keeping her tongue working tirelessly on her most sensitive part. Charlie moaned louder as Joey added another finger. They grew in passion. Joey worked harder and faster, relentlessly offering every ounce of pleasure she could manage. She felt Charlie tremble beneath her as she cried out in climax. Joey kept going until she felt Charlie settle back against the mattress. She kissed her several times and slowly withdrew her fingers.

Charlie was still gasping when Joey moved back up to lie beside her on the bed. She opened her eyes and gazed at her lover, reaching out to hold her hand.

"That was amazing," Charlie eventually breathed. "Obviously."

She blushed, hoping she hadn't done anything embarrassing. She had never let go like that with another person before. She'd faked it more often than she'd reached orgasm for real. Even with partners she'd quite enjoyed being with, she hadn't quite been able to relax enough with them with any sort of regularity. And she'd certainly never known someone to take such time and offer such commitment to pleasing her.

"I'm glad," Joey said gently. "All I want to do is make you happy."

Charlie turned to face her, stroking her face.

"You definitely do that," she said. "And not just by... you know. Although that was... well, I didn't realise before that sex could be so... so good."

Now it was Joey's turned to blush. She squeezed Charlie's hand and kissed her lips.

"I love you," she said earnestly.

"I love you too."

Charlie moved in to kiss her again. Her hands fumbled with removing the rest of Joey's clothes.

"I'm nervous about... but I hope I can... If... if you want me to..."

She shook her head, embarrassed about her inability to complete a sentence. Joey laughed.

"You don't have to do anything you don't want to," she said. "If you're not ready to..."

Charlie quickly moved Joey onto her back. She knelt on the bed and removed Joey's shorts and then her underwear. Admiring her body and feel endeared by the cute look of self consciousness on Joey's face, Charlie smiled.

"I really, really want to," she said.


	7. Chapter 7

_Thank you so much to everyone who cared so much last time I posted. I think you're all so amazing and, having had a bit of a rough week, your reviews and messages and everything really mean so much to me. So this one is dedicated to all of you! Love, IJKS xxx_

**Chapter Seven**

Feeling rather nervous, Charlie gently kissed her way down Joey's body. She started with her lips, moving along her jaw and down her neck. Straddling Joey's lean body, she kissed between her breasts before taking each one in her mouth in turn. Her head was still spinning at the realisation that she loved being intimate with a woman so much. She was nervous about going further south and felt a lot of pressure to get it right. Joey had proved without any doubt that she was talented in such areas and Charlie hoped she would measure up. After all this panic and concern over being together, she hoped that they wouldn't get to the ultimate moment and then have Joey decide that they weren't sexually compatible. She heard Joey moan. Encouraged, Charlie toyed with her nipple with more vigour. Joey moaned louder, writhing a little beneath her. Keeping her mouth occupied, Charlie ran her fingers up and down her body. Releasing Joey's breast, Charlie kissed further down Joey's body, along her toned tummy and then took a breath when she reached her hips.

Wriggling down between Joey's legs, Charlie glanced up at her. Joey looked down, her face full of desire and anticipation. Needing no further encouragement, Charlie focussed on the task in hand. She had never seen this part of a woman up close and in the flesh before. She was surprised by just how beautiful she thought Joey was. But then, the feelings Joey provoked in her these days, were always surprising. Gently, Charlie stroked her thumb over Joey's most intimate part. Joey moaned again and parted her legs a little further. Charlie smiled at the warmth she was emitting. Carefully, she began to explore her with her fingers, teasing her and exciting herself all at the same time. It was thrilling to be so close to Joey, to touch her and feel her beneath her hands. She enjoyed provoking reactions in her and getting to know her on such an intimate level.

Lowering herself down between Joey's legs, Charlie delicately began to kiss the inside of her thighs. Joey closed her eyes and moaned again. Thrills shot through her body as she felt Charlie's tongue gently press against her. Charlie flicked her tongue over Joey's clitoris, quickly building up a rhythm of pleasure. She delighted at the way she felt and tasted and found herself getting turned on all over again the more Joey seemed to ache for her. Working hard to bring her to climax, Charlie refused to let her tongue relent. Joey closed her eyes and gripped the blankets as her pleasure reached its peak. Charlie could barely breathe as she enjoyed Joey's orgasm almost as much as Joey did.

Sitting up, she watched Joey attempt to recover. Charlie moved up the bed and cuddled up to her.

"Was that okay?" she asked nervously.

Joey laughed and reached out to stroke Charlie's hair.

"I think we can safely say that was more than okay!" she said.

Her head was still swimming. She pulled their bodies close together and kissed gently in the lamp lit room. When they pulled apart, Charlie was worried to see tears in Joey's eyes.

"What's wrong?" she asked. "Did I make a mistake? I'm sorry! I thought..."

Joey hugged her.

"I'm crying because I'm happy," she assured her.

Charlie smiled.

"Really?" she asked.

"Charlie, this time a few weeks ago, I never thought I could even so much as look at another person again," Joey said. "I certainly never thought I could be intimate with someone. And I couldn't have imagined that if I could be with someone again, that I'd be lucky enough for it would be you."

She kissed her.

"I never thought someone like you could ever love someone like me."

Charlie chewed her lip, trying not to cry herself.

"I think you think too highly of me, Joey," she said. "If anything, I don't deserve you."

"Don't be silly," Joey said affectionately. "You're my hero."

They kissed again. Joey suddenly shivered.

"Are you cold?" Charlie worried.

"A little," Joey admitted.

Charlie suggested they got under the covers. They both stood. Charlie lifted her side of the duvet but Joey hesitated.

"Are you sure you want me to stay over?" she asked. "I mean, Ruby will ask questions and..."

Charlie climbed into bed and reached her arms out to Joey.

"I want you to stay," she assured her.


	8. Chapter 8

_Sorry I disappeared. I had a friend staying for a few days so I didn't get time to update. But I will do three today, so consider this your first one. I hope you enjoy it. The proverbial is about to hit! Love, IJKS xxx_

**Chapter Eight**

Ruby was up early the next morning. She felt sorry for Joey and Charlie and also a little guilty. It had been quite the shock to stumble upon her sister making out with a girl on her bed and while she was still absolutely sure that Charlie Buckton could never be into girls, she wondered if she hadn't reacted as well as she should have. She'd been aware for some time now, just how close Charlie and Joey were. She'd mentioned only a few days ago that she thought Joey had a crush on Charlie. And that made sense. Charlie had rescued her from a dire situation and given her a whole new lease of life. She'd showered her in attention and affection and it was undeniable that Charlie was beautiful, inside and outside. Of course Joey would be interested. But the idea of Charlie being interested in return, did not make sense. And if Ruby was being completely honest, the idea didn't sit well with her. She was used to Charlie dating guys. Sure, of all of them, Joey was actually the nicest person Charlie had chosen to spend her time with, but Ruby did not want to start having to refer to her sister as a lesbian.

Heading into the kitchen, Ruby put the kettle on. Her plan was to make Charlie a nice, big breakfast, with both coffee and orange juice as a treat. She knew she would be feeling guilty about Joey, especially as her friend had decided that the only thing she could do was move out. Charlie had been more than a little miserable that evening and Ruby felt at least partly responsible for it so she was determined to cheer her up.

* * *

Charlie woke up slowly. Fluttering her eyelids open, she took a moment to process the situation she was in. Firstly, she was naked and tucked nicely beneath the sheets. Secondly, she wasn't alone. Memories of the beautiful night she had spent with Joey flitted through her mind. Glancing down at the woman asleep with her head resting gently on her chest, Charlie smiled. She could feel Joey's arm draped across her tummy, hugging her. Her smile lingered as she recalled the best love making she had ever experienced. Really, it was the only love making experience she'd ever had. She'd had sex with a few guys but last night had been something else entirely. When Joey had kissed her, she'd felt loved. When she'd touched her, she'd felt adored. When she'd brought her to orgasm, it had felt like she really meant it and really wanted to make her happy. She'd been generous and gentle. She'd been passionate and patient. And while Charlie knew she was going to feel awkward when the time came to face the world and come out, she also knew that after a night like that, after coming so close to losing Joey for good, she could never risk letting her go. She gently kissed the top of Joey's head, taking a moment to breathe her in.

"I love you so much," she whispered.

* * *

Ruby was cooking up a storm in the kitchen when Leah and VJ arrived down for breakfast.

"Wow!" Leah commented. "You look busy!"

Ruby grinned and nodded.

"Sorry I haven't made enough for everyone," she said. "I just wanted to do something nice for Charlie. She's feeling a bit down."

"Is that because Joey moved out?" Leah asked.

"I'm down about that too," VJ put in.

"Yeah, it's sad," Ruby agreed, although she couldn't help but feel glad that Joey wouldn't be putting silly ideas into Charlie's head anymore.

"At least it's good that she's trying to stand on her own two feet again though," Leah said. "It wouldn't do her any good to get too reliant on Charlie."

* * *

Joey smiled to herself. She'd just been waking up when she'd heard Charlie tell her that she loved her. Shifting a little, she turned to face her, gazing into her eyes for several moments. The two women smiled at each other and kissed tenderly.

"No regrets?" Joey asked, a hint of anxiety in her voice.

Charlie kissed her again.

"Absolutely none," she promised.

They froze when there was a knock on the door. Before Charlie could respond, the door opened. Ruby appeared, holding a breakfast tray which she promptly dropped. The sound reverberated through the house. Then Ruby turned and fled.


	9. Chapter 9

_This is the penultimate chapter so just one more to go and I will start posting a new fic called 'Hearts on Fire'. It's set outside the original CJ storyline and will last for twenty seven chapters. For now, I hope you enjoy the CJ togetherness in this chapter. Love, IJKS xxx_

**Chapter Nine**

Charlie leapt out of bed, apologising to Joey as she threw her robe on and raced out of her bedroom. Joey sat up, pulling the covers a little protectively around herself as she debated whether to stay put or get up and try to help Charlie out of their awkward situation.

"Ruby!" Charlie called desperately.

Ruby whirled around by the kitchen door. Leah and VJ stared between the siblings, concerned that world war three was about to break out.

"Ruby, please..."

"What?" Ruby screeched.

"Let me explain."

"How are you going to explain the fact that I just caught you fucking a girl?"

Leah's eyes widened and she sent VJ off to his bedroom.

"It's not like that," Charlie said seriously. "Joey and I..."

"Joey?" Leah squeaked, before quickly apologising for getting involved.

"Yes, Joey," Ruby said, turning to her housemate and landlady. "I just found Charlie in bed with Joey."

She turned her attention back to her sister.

"And it was disgusting!"

Joey appeared in yesterday's clothes and unbrushed hair, looking anxious. Charlie turned to her and reached out her hand, pulling her closer, wanting both to protect and be protected.

"Joey and I have fallen in love with each other."

Ruby looked horrified.

"Why are you being like this, Rubes?" Charlie asked. "You've never had a problem with people being gay before."

"I don't have a problem with _people _being gay," Ruby replied. "But you're not. I don't know what the hell you think you're doing."

"Nor do I!" Charlie admitted. "Maybe I'm bi or something. I don't know. All I do know is that I love Joey and I want to be with her. I've tried to fight it but it's impossible. Our feelings are too strong."

"You like men, Charlie," Ruby insisted. "You like big muscled, strong jawed, handsome _men_. With penises! You don't like girls. How can you just switch like that?"

"I don't know!" Charlie yelled. "But it's happened so deal with it!"

Joey and Leah looked like they were watching a tennis match. Their eyes flitted between the sisters who looked just about ready to start tearing chunks out of each other.

"No, I won't deal with it!" Ruby snapped. "This is ridiculous! And it's wrong, Charlie. Don't you think Joey's been through enough without you messing her around and hurting her?"

"I'm not going to hurt her," Charlie said.

She turned to face her girlfriend, searching her eyes.

"I'm not going to hurt you," she said more gently. "I want to love you for as long as I'm able. I want to share my life with you. And I know I've messed you around these past few days but I swear I wouldn't be with you like this now if I didn't mean it, if I didn't think I could follow through."

"I know," Joey said softly, squeezing her hand.

Charlie had promised as much last night and Joey knew neither of them would be there if they hadn't believed their love could last. Charlie smiled affectionately at her and then turned back to Ruby.

"Please can you accept that Joey's my girlfriend?" she asked timidly.

Ruby shook her head. Her mind was spinning.

"I just don't understand how you can switch so easily from liking guys to liking girls. There's never been a hint that you could be a lesbian, Charlie."

"I'm not saying I'm a lesbian," Charlie told her. "I'm not making a statement about sexuality. What I'm realising though is that you can fall for anyone. I always thought I'd end up with a guy but it just hasn't happened that way. I feel more strongly for Joey than I have felt for any of the guys I've dated put together. It's just... powerful. More powerful than either of us."

Ruby studied her sister's face. Leah and Joey continued to watch their interaction.

"How could you let yourself be seduced by a woman?" Ruby asked.

"Joey didn't seduce me," Charlie stated firmly.

"I don't think I know how to seduce anyone," Joey put in.

Charlie grinned at her.

"It just happened," she said. "We have a connection. And while I full accept that I have terrible taste in men, I think I can proudly say that I make up for it in exceptional taste in women."

She grinned. So did Joey and Leah. Joey also blushed. Ruby tried not to join in. Shaking her head, she decided to go for a walk. Charlie's heart sank. She turned a little awkwardly to Leah.

"Is this okay?" she asked. "I mean, I know this is your house and..."

Leah stood up and hugged both of them.

"I don't have any problems with you being together," she promised. "But can I have your help in explaining things to VJ? Ruby's little outburst is going to have provoked a lot of questions. And if he knows you two are sharing a room..."

Charlie and Joey both nodded.

"And for the record, I'm sure Ruby will calm down," Leah said. "She'll just need a bit of time."

* * *

It had been a strange day. Charlie and Joey had unpacked Joey's things properly and shyly decided that they would be living in the house as a proper couple. It had been nice to relax in each other's company, having decided once and for all to make a real go of things. It was scary and exciting for both of them, to alter Charlie's room so that it was _their _room. Neither of them had done the long term thing before and they'd certainly never lived with a girlfriend or boyfriend. Joey had teased Charlie that she was already turning into a lesbian cliché by having them move in together so quickly but Charlie had pointed out that there were necessary circumstances. It had been easy to hang out, chat and laugh together. They had also made out a lot. Charlie could feel her confidence growing in that department and she hoped that she would be able to make Joey happy. Joey in turn, hoped that Ruby was wrong and that she would be enough for Charlie. She'd already fallen head over heels for her and she never wanted to stop.

Leaving the bedroom, Joey found Charlie in the kitchen, putting her car keys into her bag. They'd decided to go for a romantic dinner at the Diner to mark their first day as a genuine item. Sneaking up behind her girlfriend, Joey wrapped her arms around Charlie's narrow waist and hugged her, kissing her shoulder. She thought she looked extremely beautiful in the black dress she was wearing and she loved her hair when it was wavy and long. In black trousers and a long sleeved white top, Joey hoped she wasn't a disappointment. Charlie smiled and turned around happily in Joey's embrace. She leant in and kissed her.

"You know, I am happier right now than I have ever been in my whole life," Charlie said honestly.

Joey smiled at her, pulling her a little closer.

"And I really do commend myself for having awesome taste," Charlie smirked. "Because you are the most wonderful, beautiful, incredible person I have ever known in all my life."

Joey blushed. Charlie stroked her hair lovingly, getting lost in her eyes for a moment.

"I love you," Joey told her.

"I love you too."

"And I hope Ruby will come round."

Charlie sighed and nodded, admitting that the only thing that could make her world complete right now would be for Ruby to accept them as a couple.

"I feel like everything is almost perfect," she said. "I'm so happy with you and you mean so much to me. You make me laugh, you get me all excited and you make me a better person. I feel like I can do and be anything so long as I have you by my side. Nobody has ever had that kind of effect on me before. I just hope Ruby can get on board and see what I see when I think of us together."

"Charlie, if she doesn't..." Joey ventured.

Charlie was unnerved by the suddenly serious expression on her face.

"If she doesn't then I'll move out."

"What?" Charlie asked, alarmed.

"I just... I know how much Ruby means to you. You couldn't live without her and I would never ever want to get in the way of that. So, if she really can't deal then I think the fairest thing would be for me to let you go and..."

She took a breath, hardly able to bear the thought. Charlie looked upset.

"Is this your way of telling me you don't want to be with me?" she asked.

"No! No, of course not. I desperately want to be with you. But I don't want to hurt you and pull you away from Ruby."

"But she'd be the one pushing me away..."

"Whatever the reasons, it would still hurt you," Joey pointed out. "I love you so much Charlie. I just want you to be happy."

Charlie nodded and suggested they dealt with it when the time came. Joey nodded and both of them silently wished that Ruby would come round quickly. Charlie hated the idea that she might lose the love of her life so quickly after she'd found her. Sure, Joey hadn't been the person she'd expected to fall for but now that she had, she was happy about it. She just wished Ruby could be pleased for her too. Leaning in, Charlie kissed her. They wrapped their arms around each other, getting immediately carried away, unaware, that Ruby was outside the house, having heard everything through the open window.


	10. Chapter 10

_I have to go for a hospital appointment in London tomorrow so I won't be able to update so I thought I would do it today. And as it turns out to be the last chapter of this fic, it means you'll also get the first chapter of my new fic 'Hearts on Fire' as well. I shall post that up in a moment._

**Chapter Ten**

Ruby cleared her throat and, blushing, Charlie and Joey pulled apart, having got a little involved in their make out session.

"Hey, Ruby..." Charlie said uncertainly.

"Hey," the teenager replied.

She watched the way they clutched each other's hands.

"Look, I don't profess to understand what's going on between you but if you're really happy, if you're really in love then..."

She shrugged.

"Well, then I'm not about to step on that."

Charlie almost collapsed with relief. Joey stepped in to hold her.

"I heard what you guys were saying just now," Ruby said.

Charlie and Joey both looked startled. Ruby gestured to the open window.

"Maybe we can... maybe we can sit down and talk about it?"

"Well, we were going to go out for dinner," Charlie ventured. "Would you like to come with us?"

"I wouldn't want to intrude..."

"You wouldn't be!" Charlie said quickly.

She turned to Joey for confirmation.

"We'd love you to come," the deckhand said with a gentle smile.

"Okay, well... I'll just go and get changed," Ruby said.

* * *

Forty minutes later, Charlie and Joey were seated round a table in the corner of the Diner. All three were aware that they didn't want to be overheard. This whole thing was still so new and they were all just finding their way.

"So, when did this all happen?" Ruby asked, hoping she sounded interested and not aggressive.

"Well, from my perspective, we had had a connection from the start," Charlie ventured, glancing at Joey for confirmation.

Joey nodded. Encouraged, Charlie continued.

"I really didn't realise what was happening until a few days ago. It was actually you that pointed it out to me."

Ruby looked surprised and then recalled the conversation they'd had on the day that Charlie and Joey had meant to go on their picnic at the lighthouse.

"You were right about what you said but the thing you missed was that it wasn't a one sided thing," Charlie said. "I didn't realise anything was there at all but once I started thinking Joey might have feelings for me, it freaked me out because I immediately realised that I had feelings for her too."

She smiled, feeling more comfortable the more she talked about it.

"When Joey took me out on the boat the other day we..."

"Something happened then?" Ruby asked, her eyes wide.

"We had a moment," Charlie said with a little chuckle. "I think if I hadn't panicked and fled, we probably would have kissed but I just couldn't cope with the idea of having an attraction to another girl."

"And how does that work?" Ruby asked. "I'm not judging. I'm just asking. But... how do you suddenly find yourself attracted to a woman when you haven't been before? I mean, you haven't before, have you?"

Charlie shook her head.

"It's never happened before," she confirmed, reaching for Joey's hand. "And I don't know what it means about how I should identify or whatever but..."

She gazed lovingly at Joey for a moment.

"There's just something so amazing about Joey. I just... I've fallen completely and totally in love with her."

Joey grinned back, squeezing her hand. Ruby giggled. They both blushed and looked at her, reluctantly breaking their hands away.

"This is weird," the teenager said. "But I have to admit that it's kind of sweet. I've never seen you like this before, Charlie."

"I've never felt like this before," Charlie admitted.

"So... are you like... girlfriends now?"

Charlie again looked to Joey for confirmation. Joey nodded and smiled, hoping that Charlie would agree.

"Yeah," the police officer said. "We are."

"And are you going to tell people or...?"

"Yes," Charlie said, taking a breath. "I mean, Leah already knows and after what happened this morning, we've got to sit down and explain things to VJ. And when it feels appropriate, we'll go and talk to Dad and Morag. And it's Summer Bay so it's pretty inevitable that people will figure it out and probably judge us. And gossip. It's not going to be easy."

Ruby nodded.

"But if you can support us..."

"I can," Ruby promised. "I will. It's just... wow."

Charlie nodded and then smiled.

"It's very wow," she said.

"And Joey," Ruby said. "You feel as strongly for Charlie as she does for you?"

"I'm desperately in love with your sister," Joey said honestly.

Charlie blushed.

"I think she's the most amazing woman on earth and as long as I have your blessing, I'd really like to be with her and to make her happy. And I know your head's spinning but ours are too. Charlie never expected to want to be with a woman and me... well, I never thought I could ever be with anyone again. And if I was able, I certainly didn't think I stood a chance with someone as incredible as Charlie. It's like a dream come true."

Charlie and Joey beamed at each other, losing themselves in the moment. Ruby chuckled.

"Well, like I said, if you're happy, I'm happy," Ruby said. "And you guys definitely seem ecstatic. I hope... I hope this has a happy ending."

"I'm feeling confident for the first time in my life," Charlie admitted. "I've never loved anyone before and I don't think anyone has ever loved me."

She smiled and turned back to Joey, holding her hand again.

"You make me feel complete, Joey," she said. "Thank you for having so much patience with me and I hope that I can make you happy. I've fallen so hard and so quickly. It's all a little bit scary but I hope that I can be the person you think I am. I hope I can make you happy. I never want to let you go."

Without thinking, and in full view of everyone, Charlie leant across the table and kissed her.

_

* * *

_

I hope you've enjoyed this story and it's sappy, happy ending! I can promise you in this particular universe there will be no cheatage and Charlie and Joey will live happily ever after. Love, IJKS xxx


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